I drove away from my boys today with a heavy heart. I really didn't want to leave them at home alone, but in this instance it's for the best. I keep checking my bags thinking I've left something vital at home - it's only just dawned on me the vital thing I have left at home is my husband and our son. I miss them terribly already and I only left them this afternoon! Sitting here editing photos taken over the last week have just reminded me of the little monkey I have at home and what a wonderful little man he is (when he's not screaming and throwing a massive tantrum!)
|J feeling the love|
Also of course missing my wonderful husband, who is so wonderful that without a moment's hesitation he suggested that I travelled down here to stay with mum and he'd stay at home with J, and thankful for wonderful husband's work colleagues who quickly moved mountains to ensure that his holiday time could start earlier than planned, enabling me to get here today (Friday) instead of the planned Sunday.
While I left the boys with heavy heart, I know they'll look after one another. I did all the shopping before I left so I know they won't go hungry and Grandma P has promised me she'll look after them in my absence. I couldn't stay at home fretting while mum was in hospital and dad was beside himself. He makes out like he's tough as old boots but he's a soft old sausage really and he adores my mum. Watching them walk hand in hand earlier made me melt, I'm so proud of them - they celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary in September this year, and they still walk hand in hand.
Here I am, sitting in my old bedroom listening to the rain fall on the sloping window and the trains going past on the railway line that feels close enough to touch, yet somehow it's so quiet compared to my house with dogs claws scrabbling for grip on laminate flooring and either a dog singing, a radio playing a favourite song, the TV showing Thomas, or Peppa, or Shrek for the five hundredth time or a toddler asking "Why, mummy?" and a washing machine on spin cycle. Its very odd to have switched from wife & mummy mode back into daughter / older sister mode. I am missing Daddy P and J like mad but right now my family time has to mean being here for my wonderful mum like she has always been there for me whenever I've needed her.
|With my mum|